There’s Still Time To Order These Hilarious St. Patrick’s Day T-Shirts

st patrick's day in quarantine
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Ah, St. Patrick’s Day. It’s the one day of the year when it’s perfectly acceptable — nay, encouraged — to act like a drunken fool. Unlike other holidays, dressing up on Saint Paddy’s is practically mandatory: show up at your school or work without sporting anything green and you’re likely to receive a few pinches (and maybe a noogie or two). Fortunately, because having the right attire is so important, there are tons of great St. Patrick’s Day shirts you can order online.

Sure, you’re cutting it a bit close. St. Patrick’s Day 2021 takes place on Wednesday, March 17, but thanks to the modern miracle that is Amazon Prime, you can order these green t-shirts today and have them arrive just in time to start day drinking on Wednesday.

Though this year’s St. Patrick’s Day is going to look a little bit different than St. Patrick’s Days of years past, with some COVID restrictions lifting around the country, we’re sure you can figure out a solid way to spend the lucky holiday this year. From socially-distanced backyard BBQs to outdoor tables with friends at a local pub, you’re going to need to dress up. A little effort never killed anybody — especially during a pandemic.

From cute and cuddly shirts to NSFW options and a few historical references thrown in for good measure, we’ve gathered up eight of our favorite St. Patrick’s Day shirts for men. Now you don’t have to scramble to put on something green at the last minute. And while you’re preparing for St. Patrick’s Day, don’t forget to pick up some quality Irish whiskey for your celebrations. Outside of green beer, nothing says Saint Paddy’s like a shot of Jameson.

  

1. I’m Irish Don’t Kiss Me

BEST OVERALL

There’s no smarter shirt to wear in 2021 on St. Patrick’s Day than this. Given the tumultuous last year we’ve had, there’s no way you aren’t a little bit germaphobic at this point. Take a current way of thinking into a saying you’ve heard all your life, “Kiss me, I’m Irish” with this shirt that ensures you’ll be getting zero smooches this year. Hell, throw on your best face mask too just to be sure. Better safe than sorry!

I'm Irish Don't Kiss Me Courtesy of Amazon

  

2. Quarantine St. Patrick’s Day Tee

RUNNER UP

A zero decked shamrock-covered toilet paper? A one depicted by a leprechaun dabbing in a face mask? Does it get any more 2021 than this? The answer is absolutely not. Think about it: if you saw this shirt in 2019, what in the world would you even think? It would never make any sort of sense, which makes this baby a genuine relic of our times. Time to stock up and snag one for the whole fam the same way you did with toilet paper this time last year.

Quarantine St. Patrick's Day Tee Courtesy of Amazon

  

3. Dat Lass Tho

FUNNIEST SHIRT

For when you want a shirt people will surely notice (and raise their glass to), this hilarious T-shirt is a must. Made from a mix of cotton and polyester, it comes in a classic fit with double-needle sleeves and an extremely vibrant and crisp graphic. Black not your color? No problem. It’s also available in white, gray and orange. Sizes tend to fit tight, so be sure to check the measuring chart before you order.

Dat Lass Shirt Image courtesy of Amazon
  

4. Spongebob St. Patrick’s Day

BEST CARTOON

You cannot hate on Patrick Star. It is simply impossible. Celebrate St. Patrick’s Day this year with the loveable, goofy starfish from Bikini Bottom clad on your tee. Although the holiday isn’t about him, it’s always about him. While you’re at it, pick up the new SpongeBob SquarePants What Do You Meme? expansion pack and turn it into a festively fun drinking game.

Spongebob St. Patrick's Day Courtesy of Amazon

  

5. Go Home Snakes, You’re Drunk

BEST HISTORICAL REFERENCE

Bring a little class to your St. Paddy’s activities with this fun (and comfy) tee. Made from US-grown cotton (fancy that!), this one-of-a-kind design is expertly screen printed on each and every shirt, resulting in a higher-quality graphic that’ll last longer. Unlike other generic tees, these are made from extra comfy high-strung cotton. In other words, they look great, and they feel great.

Snakes Shirt Image courtesy of Amazon
  

6. Peanuts Snoopy Lucky Clovers Shirt

CUTEST SHIRT

Because who doesn’t love Snoopy (and Woodstock)? This adorable Peanuts-inspired is one of the few that doesn’t come in green, but don’t worry about getting pinched — there’s plenty of green in the design. This officially licensed Peanuts shirt is surprisingly breathable and fits like a glove, so there’s really no need to worry about ordering the wrong size.

Peanuts Shirt Image courtesy of Amazon
  

7. Shut Up Liver, You’re Fine

BEST FOR DAY DRINKING

Going the whole day with a dyed-green beer in your hand? Good, you’re celebrating the holiday right. Tell your liver what it really needs to hear this year after all of the booze you’re going to consume. Remember to always drink responsibly!

Shut Up Liver, You're Fine Courtesy of Amazon

  

8. Ireland Shamrock T-Shirt

BEST CLASSIC SHIRT

Show your Irish pride with this classic T-shirt featuring the unmistakable green, white and orange flag with the Irish clover. Made from super comfy soft poly-cotton, it’s without a doubt one of the comfiest shirts on our list. A great generic option that’s great for everyone, you really can’t go wrong with this one. Bonus: Unlike the other shirts, this one works for other Irish-themed events too, including sports games and U2 concerts!

Shamrock Shirt Image courtesy of Amazon
  

9. Star Wars Lack Of Green Celtic St. Patrick’s Graphic T-Shirt

BEST FOR NERDS

This tee combines two of our favorite things in one: Star Wars and St. Paddy’s! Featuring Darth Vader and two sinister-looking stormtroopers, this shirt is sure to be a hit as you embark on your bar-hopping festivities with your friends. Available in three different types of green, it also makes a great gift idea for those Star Wars fans in your life. Purchase it, you must.

Star Wars Shirt Image courtesy of Amazon
  

10. Zero Lucks Given St. Patrick’s Day Lucky Irish T-Shirt

BEST DOUBLE-TAKE

Are you more of a minimalist who doesn’t mind some smart writing? Then this tee is for ye. “Zero Lucks Given” is a straightforward message which also translates to the perfect mantra for St. Patrick’s Day. Witty and comfy, this awesome shirt comes in a range of colors (five to be exact) and is a great option to help you celebrate in style.

Zero Lucks Shirt Image courtesy of Amazon
  

11. Day Drinking Made Me Do It

MOST HONEST

Had way too many beers and a blackout? Woke up to a dozen messages of friends asking where you went after the last round? Realized you slept on someone else’s couch, but still don’t know the owner? If you answered yes to any (or all) of these questions, then “Day Drinking Made Me Do It” is the St. Patrick’s tee for you. Available in a range of colors, it’s made from 100% cotton and fits like a charm (get it?). Best of all, it works for other occasions, too.

Day Drinking Shirt Image courtesy of Amazon
  

12. Lucky The Leprechaun Shirt

LUCKIEST SHIRT

As far as leprechauns go, few are as popular or adorable as Lucky the Leprechaun. Sure, it may not come with Lucky Charms, but this is one shirt that’s sure to garner a few smiles. Made from soft poly-cotton, it features a more vintage design, so you won’t have to worry about it looking worn over time. Sizes range from small to extra-extra large, so you’re sure to find the right fit.

Lucky Charms Shirt Image courtesy of Amazon