Everyone is talking about Midnights, Taylor Swift’s latest album that was released last week. Prior to the release, Swift described the album on Instagram as “the stories of 13 sleepless nights scattered throughout my life.” Now that we’ve had time to listen to the album several times on repeat we’ve discovered more than a few lyrics that keep us up at night.
If you’ve listened to the album, you know it is equal parts swoon-worthy and cringe-inducing. One moment, however, stands out as particularly confusing. In the middle of the third track, Anti-Hero, Swift declares, “Sometimes I feel like everybody is a sexy baby and I’m a monster on the hill.” Sexy baby? Huh?
If you haven’t gotten a real night’s sleep since the album dropped because you are obsessing over questions of existential crisis like: what exactly is a sexy baby? How does one become a sexy baby? Have I ever encountered a sexy baby? How often should I feel like a sexy baby? Do other people feel like sexy babies? We’re here to help.
We’ve dug up a few of Taylor’s lovers to help us understand what constitutes a sexy baby in her eyes in the hopes that we can emulate their trademark style to become sexy babies ourselves. Take a look at our list of Taylor Swift’s most notable partners to build your own closet of sexy baby essentials.
1. Jake Gyllenhaal
ALL TOO WELL
Jake Gyllenhaal has come a long way since the All Too Well era. He has graduated from Taylor Swift’s old scarf and has turned into quite the chic dresser. Jake has entered his Sexy Baby era with a streamlined sense of style favoring high-end basics and a capsule wardrobe. He often opts for a casual look dressed up with a double breasted blazer or bomber jacket. Recreate the Sexy Baby: Jake Edition look below.
Double Breasted Blazer
This double breasted blazer from ASOS screams sexy baby. The bold blue color and bright buttons are sure to wow.
Neutral Turtleneck
Look for a neutral turtleneck that’s thin enough to layer, but nice enough to wear on its own. This cashmere option from Bonobos is lightweight and washable, making it perfect for the Sexy Baby: Jake Edition look.
2. Joe Jonas
INVISIBLE STRING
Out of all the Jonas brothers, Joe has always been our favorite and his style reflects that. He’s playful and bold, the perfect ingredients for the making of any sexy baby. He often opts for a layered look with a statement piece paired with some fun frames.
Funky Jacket
When trying to emulate the Jonas iteration of the Sexy Baby, opt for outerwear that is bold, colorful and patterned. This shirt-jacket from Urban Outfitters perfectly encapsulates Joe Jonas’ confidence and love of color. Available in three colors, be your own sexy baby with this piece.
Bold Sunglasses
If we’re going off of Joe’s sense of style, it seems like sexy babies must take risks. Do away with boring black frames and lenses and opt for a pop of color. These black sunglasses with orange frames come from Quality Mending Company on Etsy and will automatically elevate your look from monster on a hill to sexy baby.
3. Tom Hiddleston
GETAWAY CAR
Tom Hiddleston is not the most memorable sexy baby, but he did get Taylor’s seal of approval for a short time. These days, Tom’s brand of sexy hinges mostly on his full head of hair. He evokes a sort of messy, casual, over-worked man in academia sort of sexy. To be sexy like Tom, focus on your grooming habits.
Styling Cream
For a healthy head of hair that will make onlookers stop and say, “who is that sexy baby?” grab a styling cream. This option from Malin + Goetz smoothes and shines hair without making your hair crusty or greasy. This is a great product for men with long hair, or men growing their hair out.
Dry Shampoo
Listen up, sexy babies. Just because you don’t have time to shower, doesn’t mean your hair should suffer. Dry shampoo is perfect for using in a pinch when you don’t have time, or you’re just too lazy, for a full styling session. Try this option from Rahua that will leave your hair voluminous and refreshed.
4. Harry Styles
OUT OF THE WOODS
With all that is going on right now with Harry Styles, you might have forgotten that he and Taylor did share a romance once upon a time. Harry’s style these days is full of color, clashing prints and bell-bottom pants. If you’re interested in being the Harry Styles sort of sexy baby, opt for color, sparkles and anything unexpected.
Patterned Pants
Don’t be afraid to lean into funky prints. Harry loves checkered pants, striped pants, polka-dot pants, sparkly pants, and more. If you see a pair of pants that looks fit for Candyland, you’re on the right track. This wide-leg checkerboard pair from ASOS is a great starting point.
Printed Shirt
Harry’s love of colorful prints is not limited to pants. Grab a shirt with a clashing print to pair with your funky pair of pants for a Harry-inspired look. This option from ASOS is 70’s inspired and serves just enough camp without being too over-the-top for an everyday look.
5. Joe Alwyn
LONDON BOY
Ah yes, the sexiest baby of them all. Joe Alwyn is Taylor’s longest-lasting relationship in years, so naturally we had to include him.
Taylor seems to have a sexy baby type, and that is a double-breasted boy. Like Jake, Joe loves a double breasted blazer or coat. It’s hard to separate him from his Conversations with Friends character on Hulu, but it seems both the real Joe and Joe’s character prefer classic pieces, like turtlenecks, chunky sweaters and a good pair of jeans.
Wool Coat
When you’re looking for something classic, Ralph Lauren is a great place to start. A double-breasted wool peacoat exudes Joe Alwyn and his sexy English baby vibes. Taylor would definitely love to see you in a coat like this.
Chunky Sweater
A cable-knit sweat is a must have item for any man looking to upgrade his wardrobe for the colder season. A perfect autumn to winter transitional piece, this cable-knit sweater from L.L. Bean is comfortable and comes in multiple colors. We love the cream and we think Taylor and Joe would, too.