There’s some self-care items that almost everyone has to buy at some point (condoms, rash cream, and cold sore treatment to name a few). While there’s no need to feel ashamed about purchasing these things, some of us are still embarrassed to have these personal items rung up by a drugstore cashier.
Instead, save yourself the awkward checkout process and try ordering them online. It’s more convenient and much more discreet than trying to sneak into your local store with a baseball cap and hoodie to avoid buying a pregnancy test, enema kit or lice medicine.
And for the more, well, exotic purchases you may be too embarrassed to buy (looking at you Fleshlight), you’ll be glad to know you can buy those online too! Yup, in 2020, you can buy just about everything online, from the truly embarrassing products like tongue-shaped pet brushes, to the usefully embarrassing Squatty Potty.
For those and more, take a look at our list of the most embarrassing products you can, and should, buy online. From couple’s sex toys to private medical conditions like constipation, we’ve got you covered.
1. Diarrhea Relief
Unlike a cold, a bad case of diarrhea makes it impossible to go about your day. This easy $5 relief stops the, um, flow, and also helps calm an upset stomach. Unfortunately, this can also be an incredibly awkward thing to buy at a physical store, even if self-checkout is an option. For that reason, we prefer to buy online. Also, buy it in advance. This is not one of those items you want to wait on, even if it does ship next day. If you regularly deal with this inconvenient medical problem, keep a supply of these ani-diarrheal tablets on hand for emergencies.
2. Florasone Itch & Rash Cream
Rash cream is a household essential, but buying it can be awkward — especially if the rash you’re trying to treat is visible. Instead, get it delivered to have on standby. Also, now that we think about it, it’s just as awkward to go into a store and buy rash cream if your rash isn’t visible. So, best to stock up and buy online.
3. Personal Lubricant
It’s all but impossible to have casual small talk with a cashier while they swipe and add this to your bag at check out. And like many of the other items on our list, there’s no way you won’t get an eyeful when buying this and going through self-checkout. Save yourself the trouble and awkwardness, and buy a bottle of personal lubricant online.
This lube is especially awesome as it’s made in the USA and free of and oils and parabens, which means it’s safe to use with those condoms you just picked up.
4. Preparation Hemorrhoidal Cream
If you’re already dealing with hemorrhoids, the last thing you want to do is go out and buy the treatment cream. Instead, order this one online to have at the ready. It provides fast, soothing relief from the pain that accompanies hemorrhoids. And even if you’re not suffering from hemorrhoids, it’s not the worst idea to buy some just to have on hand for future use.
5. Trojan Condoms
We’ve written many times about the best condoms for her, and it’s never been easier to replenish your condom supply online. You wouldn’t just tell a drug store cashier and everyone else in line, “I will be having sex tonight,” but that’s what it feels like when you buy condoms in person. Ordering them online is much easier, and allows you to shop around without getting any looks. Also, you can buy in bulk (you sly dog, you).
6. First Response Pregnancy Test
Some people wait weeks or months to share pregnancy news, so ordering the test discreetly is a no-brainer. First Response is one of the best tests for early detection and provides accurate readings after only a minute. With an accuracy rating of over 99 percent, you can be sure you’re in good hands with First Response.
7. Cold Sore Treatment
Even though many people suffer from cold sores, it’s still awkward to buy treatment products at your local drugstore. Next time you feel a lump in your lip, order some of this Orajel treatment online. It’ll relieve your cold-sore issues and save you from any unwanted embarrassment. Fortunately, the Internet makes it easy to order embarrassing products like cold sore medicine online.
Orajel is one of the best and gives some instant pain relief while simultaneously helping to cover any unsightly sores.
8. Toenail Fungus Remover
Toenail fungus remover is near the top of our list because it’s not like buying condoms or lube — everyone has sex, but not everyone has toenail fungus. If you have some to deal with, spare yourself the embarrassment and order the remover online.
9. Head Lice Removal Kit
Buying lice remover in person isn’t just awkward, it’s also dangerous because you can easily spread it to others. If you or your kids have head lice, quarantine yourself and order this removal kit ASAP. It’s one thing to feel awkward when buying a pack of condoms, it’s another to possibly infect the cashier.
Plus, it’s hard not to trust a product from Lice Clinics of America.
10. Male Libido Supplements
There’s no way around this one, it’s just plain awkward. No guy wants to admit he’s having any issues in this area. So if you’re unfortunately suffering from any male-specific issues, the last thing you’ll want to do is pick up a possible remedy in person. Luckily, plenty of brands will ship them to you, and do so in discreet packaging.
Our favorite brand when it comes to this sort of guy stuff is Hims. This product is basically a generic version of Viagra which helps those who suffer from erectile dysfunction. If ED isn’t your problem, or perhaps you have some others, Hims has you covered. And like we said, they’ll ship this all to your door in a discreet box.
11. Male Sex Toys
Hey man, you shouldn’t be embarrassed to buy sex toys. And yet, for some reason, most guys laugh awkwardly when the subject is brought up. Well, thankfully the internet exists so you can now pick up a vast array of the best male sex toys from the comfort of your couch. There are plenty to buy if you’re adventurous, but for our tastes, something as simple as a Fleshlight does the job just fine.
12. BDSM Leather Bondage Set
Feel like you’re possibly into some slightly more interesting bedroom activities than most? Hey man, no judgment here. We’re all for exploration (so long as those playing along are cool with it). And though you can’t exactly waltz into Walmart to pick up a bondage set, you probably wouldn’t go to your neighborhood Adult Store (those are still a thing, right?) to pick up a bondage set. But, you should buy one if you’re interested in this sort of thing. Thankfully, the internet exists and you can buy a full set with everything you need to crank up the heat in the bedroom right on Amazon.
13. Selfie Stick
2020 and the age-old riddle still stands: Is it more embarrassing to use a selfie stick, or get caught buying one? While you may feel a certain way, we think getting caught buying one is horrendous. After all, you’re likely going to only use a selfie stick while traveling (aka places where you know nobody). But picking up a selfie stick at your local store? That’s a big no-no.
This selfie stick also doubles as a tripod. And while taking the photo may be a little embarrassing, the amount of likes you’ll get on that pic is anything but.
ATUMTEK Bluetooth Selfie Stick Tripod, Extendable 3 in 1 Aluminum Selfie Stick with Wireless Remote and Tripod Stand 270 Rotation for iPhone 13/12/11 Pro/XS Max/XS/XR/X, Samsung and Smartphone Black
14. Bed Bug Spray
Nope. Not a chance. If you suspect you have bed bugs, it should be illegal to go out to a store and pick up some bed bug spray. You know those little critters can hitch a ride on your clothing, right? Buying this stuff in person is embarrassing, but it’s also like buying a lice comb. If you think you’ve got it, do the world a favor and buy online.
This spray from EcoRaider is non-toxic, natural and proven to work to kill bed bugs. Does anyone else feel itchy all of a sudden?
Bed Bug Killer 16 oz EcoVenger by EcoRaider, 100% Kill Efficacy, Bedbugs & Mites, Kills Eggs & The Resistant, Lasting Protection, USDA BIO-Certified, Plant Extract Based & Non-Toxic, Child & Pet Safe
15. Squatty Potty
There’s a lot to love about the Squatty Potty, the original toilet stool that makes it easier to go. Far be it for us to argue with doctors and the evidence. It’s clearly a helpful product. But, come on, it’s an embarrassing one to have around and an incredibly embarrassing product to buy in person. If you find that you need help in this area, then buy one of these little stools online.
Squatty Potty The Original Bathroom Toilet Stool, 7 Inch height, White
16. PDX Pet Design LICKI Brush
How much do you love your pet? If the answer isn’t, “enough to lick them,” then you’re not a true pet parent. For those of you who do love their pets, here’s an absurdly embarrassing brush. If the only thing stopping you from actually licking your pet is the idea of coughing up your own furballs, it’s your lucky day.
The PDX LICKI Brush is a tongue-shaped brush that lets you pretty much lick your beloved cat while brushing them. It’s strange, possibly sweet, mostly strange and somewhat effective. Hopefully, your pet enjoys it more than you.
17. Poo-Pourri Before-You-Go Toilet Spray
Going to the bathroom in public can be embarrassing. Buying this product in public can also be embarrassing. Avoid embarrassment in both cases by discretely picking up a bottle of Poo-Pourri spray online.
Poo-Pourri acts as a smell seal for when you don’t want anyone to know you’re going about your business. By spraying the toilet before you go, Poo-Pourri creates a seal so none of the more embarrassing smells spill out into the bathroom. So when you’re done, nobody is the wiser.