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Lovehoney’s 2023 Sex Map Tells Us What Americans Really Want (and Toys You’ll Really Want)

Every year, Lovehoney releases its annual Sex Map, which gives us a peek into the sex lives of couples around the country.  The map is made using Lovehoney’s data from 2022 sales figures, a global survey, and a global expert network’s predictions for emerging Sex Trends. This year, the 2023 Sex Map reveals all the kinky preferences of folks from different cities and states that you’ve been dying to know, with some surprising statistics.

If BDSM toys are your thing, head to New York, where plenty of residents will be hiding a set of restraints under their beds. If your thing is pegging, check out Georgia, which buys more strap-ons than any other state in the US. Be sure to check out the juiciest data for your home state, but here are some of the most popular options based on what you’re looking for.

  • If you’re curious/adventurous: looking to spice up that vanilla routine or add something new that you’ve never tried before? Washington buys more sex furniture than most states, and Alford, Florida, is very into medical/electro fetish if that tickles your fancy. Brooklyn, New York, on the other hand, purchases many chastity devices, which lock the wearer into submission. 
  • If you love BDSM: If chains and whips excite you like that Rihanna song, check out Utah, which buys the most Fifty Shades of Grey products in the USA. Handcuffs and restraints are also very popular in Washington, DC, whereas San Francisco, California, prefers stockings and fetish lingerie.
  • If bigger is better: If you’re one of those people who think this old saying is true, you’ll want to plan. Trip to South Dakota, which buys the biggest dildos. North Carolina purchases more 12-inch dildos than any other state, whereas, in Austin, Texas, inflatable butt plugs are the toy of choice. 

Check out more of the stats below in the 2023 Lovehoney Sex map, as well as our top recommendations for couple’s toys, BDSM gear, and other products related to this data. 


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Plan a trip to Utah or DC with this Fifty Shades kit which includes bed restraints and a blindfold to heighten all the sensations. A must-have for beginners, this set with Velcro-fastened cuffs creates full body restraint and can be easily secured onto any bed size. 


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Take a trip to Austin, Texas, with this toy, where it’s extremely popular. This inflatable butt plug also vibrates, making it one of Lovehoney’s most popular options and earning nearly 500 positive reviews. The inflatable aspect makes it more adjustable than other butt plugs, allowing you to buy just one rather than a set of multiple plugs. 


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Based on Lovehoney’s data this year, Arizona has the most connected couples based on the fact that they buy more wearable couples’ vibrators, specifically the We-Vibe Chorus. This wearable, c-shaped vibrator is inserted into the vagina and can be comfortably worn during sex, helping you climax simultaneously. It’s also a must-have toy for long-distance couples spending V-Day apart. 


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North Carolina won the Most Daring Award for buying more 12-inch dildos more than any other state. Although Lovehoney sells plenty of single-ended suction cup dildos that are 12 inches long, this realistic double-ended dildo provides pleasure for both users simultaneously. Why not be a little daring in 2023?

$24.99 $49.99

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This year, Texas won the Green Thumb award for always picking roses. Specifically, the Lovehoney Rose suction toy, which is a best-seller for people with vulvas. It has just two buttons, making it easy to use, and features ten suction modes. This is also the best kind of flower to gift to your loved one for Valentine’s Day this year. Right now, this waterproof toy is more affordable than ever.