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We try to keep our content pretty apolitical here at SPY, but sometimes a man has to take a stand. And that’s why I am here to unapologetically let the world know that in this house, we stan Yumi Nu, the incredibly attractive new model on the cover of the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition.
Ever since Nu’s cover photo was revealed, the model has been breaking the internet and melting brains. Unlike most models, Nu isn’t skinny, and that’s been really triggering for a lot of people.
Until recently, plus-size models were largely a joke in this country, and cover models with incredibly svelte frames dominated the pages of fashion magazines. Still, I know I’m not the only straight guy that’s excited to see a woman like Nu on the cover of the Swimsuit Edition, an annual event that has fueled the masturbatory fantasies of teenage boys and grown-ass men for decades. Once upon a time, the Swimsuit Edition was a major cultural event, although its influence has waned in an inverse relationship with the availability of internet porn.
Considering the magazine’s weakened cultural influence, Sports Illustrated has certainly succeeded in getting people to care about the Swimsuit Edition again.
On Twitter, commentator Dr. Jordan Peterson made a negative comment that was typical of the backlash:
Sorry. Not beautiful. And no amount of authoritarian tolerance is going to change that. https://t.co/rOASeeQvee
— Dr Jordan B Peterson (@jordanbpeterson) May 16, 2022
This is bullshit, obviously. (“Authoritarian tolerance” is the kind of phrase that sounds intellectual but is really just straight-up nonsense.) For the guys raging against Nu online, I have to wonder if their anger is based on the realization that women like Nu now have more capital in the sexual marketplace than your average heterosexual man.
These types of reactions do provide an important insight into the male psyche. I’ve dated and loved women with a variety of body shapes and weights in my life, and I made an interesting discovery as a young man who was attracted to curvy women.
In 2022, the chattering class talks a lot about how beauty standards are culturally constructed, and how unrealistic beauty norms cause a lot of pain, suffering and eating disorders among young women. In the male world, what does it mean for beauty standards to be culturally constructed?
Here’s what I’ve learned:
What most men find attractive has nothing to do with what traits they personally find attractive and everything to do with what they think their friends find attractive. For a certain type of guy, beauty is just another status symbol. These guys want to date women who will make their friends say, “Damn, that’s hot.” And that’s how the male hive mind plays an outsized role in defining beauty norms.
For any guys that are still trapped in this prison, it’s not too late to escape. When you do, you might just find that the world around you is full of beautiful women with big naturals.
Look, anyone with eyes can see that Yumi Nu is phenomenally attractive. If you’re not personally attracted to big beautiful curvy women, then I feel sorry for you.
I mean, damn.
What part of her healthy body, hourglass frame, perfect skin, symmetrical face, and feminine assets do you find lacking? Skinny isn’t the only way to be beautiful, and plenty of men and women appreciate full busts and rear ends.
To appreciate “plus-size” women isn’t some form of woke politics or feminism gone wrong. Humans have always been attracted to curves and hourglass figures. Take a closer look at the women in renaissance paintings (thicc), the pin-up babes of the early 20th century (thicc), and ancient fertility statues (very thicc) and you’ll see that horny guys have always loved bigger women. The New York Times recently reported on the explosion in popularity of the Brazilian Butt Lift surgery, which gives women larger, more shapely butts.
Frankly, I’m glad the giant fake boobs and dyed blonde hair of the 90s have started to fade away (and I say that with all due respect to the models of that generation). I also think back to my puberty years in the aughts, when anorexic-skinny models were held up as the feminine ideal, to disastrous effect. These beauty norms have caused a lot of pain and suffering, and in that sense, thick thighs really can save lives.
So I say again, if more women like Yumi Nu appear scantily clad on the pages of magazines, that can only be a victory — for both curvy women and the horny men who love them.