Today is World Pasta Day. Meaning, yes, totally you’re legally obliged to cheat on your diet.
As somebody who grew up in an area where they constantly filmed The Sopranos, I’ll be the first to admit that New Jersey Italian culture is engrained into my personality. It’s rumored that if you cut me open, I’ll bleed marinara sauce. I eat pasta every Sunday simply because I’ve been doing so as a kid. It’s just a part of me I’ll never let go.
But, here’s the issue when it comes to pasta when you eat it as much as me: it can get kind of boring. I’ve completely irradicated some shapes from my diet because I overdid them as a kid. And as a controversial admittance, I now refuse to eat spaghetti. Sorry.
Because today is a special pasta day, I’ve singlehandedly decided you should make your pasta dish tonight a little funkier than you usually do. How? Well, with weird pasta shapes, of course. Someone’s gotta tell you that you’ve been eating way too much penne and it’s me. I’m telling you. You’re eating too much penne.
That said, whip out your favorite pasta sauce, take out your best pasta maker and get cooking. Here are 7 funky pasta shapes you need to celebrate World Pasta Day today.
1. Sfoglini Organic Whole Grain Pasta
When it comes to weird pasta, Sfoglini has been my go-to nowadays. Not only are these pastas fun-shaped, but they’re made completely organic and are sourced from local farms. No, they’re not shaped in the size of your favorite cartoon character or anything vulgar, but Sfoglini does bring the fun element into your dinner seamlessly.
Growing up, I was under the assumption that everyone knew what pastina was, but upon moving to New York City and later on, Chicago, I’ve found that isn’t really the case. I have such a hard time finding boxes of these in local grocery stores. So much so that every time I have a friend visit me in the Midwest from Chicago, the collateral for a visit is a box of pastina. I won’t let them in if they come pastina-less. These little star-shaped pastas call for the ultimate comfort food. A chicken bouillon cube, some olive oil, Italian seasoning, a dropped egg right into the pot and complete with parmesan cheese on top? Heaven.
3. Donne Del Grano Colored Rainbow Bow Tie Pasta
While bow ties aren’t the weirdest shape on the planet, they are still kind of kooky. Especially when the bow ties in question aren’t traditional pasta-colored. These funky rainbow bow ties will add a little bit of flair to your bowl of alfredo tonight. Why? Simply because you can.
4. Pastabilities Dog Lovers Pasta
If you love dogs just as much as you love pasta, boy, we’ve got the perfect pasta shape for you. Pastabilities created this “Dog Lovers” pasta shape which includes red and white paw print and bone shapes to bring a little puppy pizazz to tonight’s dinner.
Whenever my mother made lasagna when I was a child, it took everything in my little chunky body to not steal cooked noodles from the strainer before they went into the dish. There’s something about the long, flat pasta shape edged with squiggles that feels so forbidden in my brain until this day, making cravings worse than ever. Thankfully, mafaldine pasta exists to fix that craving. Think of these as tinier, thinner lasagne noodles that actually make sense to eat solo. Toss these in a bowl of homemade tomato sauce and you’ll be good to go for tonight.
6. Chidester Farms Harvest Autumn Shape Pasta
It’s fall. You know what that means. Autumn-shaped pasta. These colorful pastas come in classic fall colors and are shaped in leafy, pumpkiny fashions. For this, pick up a funky pumpkin-based pasta sauce from the kitschiest supermarket in town (hi, Trader Joe’s) and call it a day.
7. Penis Shaped Pasta
Sorry. We had to. To top it all off, the world also offers penis-shaped pasta so you can actually physically eat a dick. You’re welcome. Happy World Pasta Day.